Image: The Happiest Mom: 10 Secrets To Enjoying Motherhood (Weldon Owen, April 2011)
Today officially kicks off my ten-week blog countdown to the launch of The Happiest Mom: 10 Secrets To Enjoying Motherhood! I’m so excited to have partnered with Parenting Magazine and Weldon Owen to create this funny, upbeat but oh-so-real look at how to live a happier life as a mom. (Can you believe how cute that spread to the left is? I’m going to be sharing each chapter opener here over the next couple of months, and they are all just as adorable as this one.)
As promised, for the first week of the countdown I’ll be focusing on Chapter 1 of the book-Take The Easy Way Out. This chapter acts as introduction of sorts, laying out the different ways we moms sometimes make our lives harder than they have to be. And for each reason I identify in the book, there’s a chapter dedicated to a “secret” that can help you work through it. For example: Does your life feel difficult because your standards are too high? Chapter 2, Aim Low and Go Slow, is a must-read. Do you have trouble asking for help, or don’t know who to ask? You’ll want to check out chapters 5 and 10, Find Your Tribe and Love Your Love Life, for tips on how to get the support you need.
I think sometimes my advice to “Take The Easy Way Out” rubs moms the wrong way. I can hear the protests now: “Motherhood isn’t supposed to be easy!” and “The harder way is sometimes the best way.”
I agree-sometimes it’s worth doing things the harder way when they’re important to you. But if motherhood feels difficult all the time, there’s a very good chance that you could make some changes to make them easier. Maybe it means you keep pouring energy into the things that really matter to you, while letting go of a few things that don’t (no matter how much you think they should.) Maybe it means relying more on other people. Maybe it means easing up your standards of yourself or others. While doing things the hard way is sometimes a fact of life for moms, there’s no award for doing everything the hard way. Sometimes you deserve to take the easy way out-and it can make you a much happier mom.
This week I’ll be heading to Nashville to speak at the Blissdom Conference, and in that spirit I’ve already got two more posts planned for the “Going Away Without The Kids” series-one on making leaving easier on the family (coming tomorrow) and one on dealing when you want to leave, but just can’t get away (look for it Wednesday.) But I’ll also be talking about some of the ways we moms make our lives harder than they have to be, and sharing some simple choices and techniques for making things easier. I also definitely plan on talking to some of the other Blissdom attendees to ask them the question: “How, when, and why do you take the easy way out?”
I’d love to hear from you on the topic, too! Do you ever find yourself doing things the hard way-for no real reason? Have you found simple ways to make your life easier-and happier?
I’m not sure I even know how to do things the easy way. Definitely something that I’ve been working on, though, particularly by letting go of the things that aren’t so important to me. Trouble is, it feels like many, many, many things are important to me. Also trouble: my idea that greater efficiency is the way to greater ease. To some extent, this idea is probably true, but the way that I implement it in my life tends to increase my anxiety.
Looking forward to your book and this series!
I am SO SO excited for you, and to read your book. This is fantastic. And this issue is near and dear to my heart. As you know, I had to hit rock bottom before I figured out that I was being to hard on myself as a mom and in other ways.
Good luck at Blissdom! If there is anything I can do to help promote the books please don’t hesitate to ask.