In Monday’s post about tightening up our family finances, I mentioned that we have been eating out too much lately, and several of you admitted that you’re in the same boat.
So how to cut down on the restaurant meals? Well, it helps to know why you’re turning to them in the first place. I reflected on it for a while and came up with four basic reasons I eat out too much – and some solutions to steer my eating habits back toward home:
Reason 1: Boredom. When life is feeling humdrum, dining out can seem like a quick fix. But honestly, I’m pretty rarely blown away by a meal out – in fact, my husband and I have started calling most restaurant experiences “The fifty-dollar disappointment.” Sure, there are amazing restaurants out there, but exceptional meals tend to come with a price tag to match. To be able to afford those great dining-out experiences, I need to cut back on the mediocre ones that I’m only craving because I’m bored with the usual routine.
Solution: Jazz up mealtime a little bit. Some ideas:
- More meals with friends and family. We usually share dinners at least once, sometimes two or three nights a week, with another family, but we’ve gotten out of the habit over the past month. Sharing a nightly meal is one of my favorite ways to make dinner time more fun: you get to share the expense and workload of getting dinner on the table, and it can turn an ordinary Wednesday night meal into a fun little party.
- Try new things. I’m a back-to-basics kind of cook, but every now and then it’s fun to experiment with new dishes, or even just an alteration on an old favorite. Grilling out can also make a “regular” meal feel like a treat.
Reason 2: Lack of Planning. It’s easy to say we don’t have “time” to cook at home, but is that really true? Or is it more that we didn’t plan ahead? True, if it’s 6:00, I haven’t taken the chicken out of the freezer yet and there are no veggies in the fridge, I “don’t have time” to go grocery shopping and then come back and prepare a meal by a reasonable time. But if I’d had everything on hand, putting it together would likely be quicker than a trip to pick up takeout (and a whole lot faster than corralling the whole family to a restaurant!)
Solution: Better planning! Lately I’ve been flaking on creating weekly menus and doing my shopping on time, which has led to stressful moments digging through the pantry and – you guessed it! – too many last-minute runs for pizza. Time to get back on the regular menu-planning, grocery-shopping wagon.
Reason 3: Date Night Syndrome. For much of our early parenting years, my husband and I rarely went out: lots of little kids and nursing babies, lack of child care, and a serious budget crunch made “date nights” few and far between. So whenever we managed it, we made the most of the date with a full-on meal experience including drinks, appetizers, an entree, and desserts (one each.)
But since our youngest is now 3 and we have two kids of legal babysitting age, heading out for an hour or two with my husband has never been easier. The problem is that we are still mentally stuck in that early-parenting stage where nights out together were scarce, and have gotten in the habit of enjoying blowout meals whenever we get the chance. It’s one thing when you’re doing that quarterly, quite another when it’s once a week!
Solution: We need to get creative about what it means to go on a “date” instead of always defaulting to the standby of a nice dinner. Some ideas that are cheap or free:
- Go for a walk, stop for ice cream
- Attend a performance at the local community theatre
- Head to the $3 movie theatre
- Look for free outdoor performances
- Have dinner with the family, then head out for a drink or dessert and coffee.
- Have more “date nights” in the house – a game of cards, shared TV show or just a quiet conversation after the kids are in bed.
Reason 4: Too Busy. Feeling frazzled at dinner time is often an indicator that my life has gotten a little too busy. If I feel pressured to check my email fifteen times between 6 and 7 PM, or have a hard time managing dinner because I’m driving kids around at that time every day, or can’t seem to wrap up my work day by 5:00 most days…then it generally means my priorities have gotten a little out of whack.
Solution: Take a hard look at my evening shuffle and see if there are things that need to go. Sometimes extra “busy-ness” is a temporary thing that I just have to get through – but sometimes, it suggests that I’ve taken on too many responsibilities or have let the kids get over-committed. We all have different levels of tolerance for “busy”, but if I can’t set aside a “kitchen hour” at least three times a week, I start to feel off-balance and have to scale back.
Did any of the above reasons for eating out too much strike a chord with you? What helps you keep restaurant meals under control?
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
Yes! #1 is us…it just seems more “fun” and “spontaneous” to eat out, then to sit around the same old dining table eating our planned & pre-cooked meal while listening to the toddler nursery rhymes CD for the 1000th time & jiggling a baby (ugh, maybe that’s just our house!). I like your idea of sharing meals with friends. Now that the weather is nicer, we also take our home-cooked meals outside, either just in our back patio or packed up to the park for a picnic, which is still “fun” and “spontaneous” but healthier & cheaper. I also like #3; getting more creative with outings with and without kids is always a good idea.
#1 and #3 are pretty true for us. We get a once a month date thanks to my sis-in-law, and we were just talking about how we need to go somewhere lower-scale next time.
Also, for me, once I eat out once, I crave restaurant food more. I went on a girls’ weekend 2 weeks ago – and have eaten out twice more since then (which is a LOT for us) – mostly just because I remembered how much I usually like restaurant food, and how great it is not to have to cook/do dishes.
But I find that if we break the cycle and don’t eat out, I sort of forget about restaurant food, and then I don’t want to eat out.
#1 is us – it feels like a little vacation to go out on a weeknight. Last time we tried it with our 18-month old at her normal bedtime, though, we realized it REALLY wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t terrible, but just so busy that we couldn’t relax. And way too expensive. I get bored quickly when we eat the same food at home, though, especially since we eat leftovers for lunch, so I’ve really been trying to find new recipes that we all like to add into the rotation.
We are back to having planned date “nights” with 2 new babies in 2 years, after our older set had gotten old enough to stay home alone, so we scheduled weekly babysitters for just two hours in the afternoon on Saturday. That way, we’ve already eaten lunch and it’s way too early for dinner, so we just go to coffee. Way cheaper, and we seem to talk more because we are spending less time eating!
I don’t mind eating out when it’s something we’ve planned. What kills me is when we run through the drive through because it’s a busy night and I didn’t make a plan to cook at home. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen often. My whole blog is dedicated to eating at home, but one tip I tell people is to keep a few go-to recipes on hand. Keep them quick and easy, preferably things you have memorized. It’s much faster to cook something in 15 minutes at home, than run out to get something. And cheaper too.
I’m tempted to eat out too often just to get out of the darn house. And also, my kids are so “well-behaved” in a restaurant. And they squabble and make a mess and, y’know, behave like children at home. So often, I get a more peaceful, engaging experience at a restaurant.
I don’t think there’s an easy fix for this. Maybe more crockpot meals paced like a restaurant meal? start with a drink, chat, wait a while, main, chat, wait a while for “the bill”, let the dishes sit, chat. But I can’t see the contrived waiting and chatting working with a 9 mo, 2 yo and 5 yo. When we’re home, I’m wanting to get things “done,” they’re pulled to their toys, annoyed by the expectations to help set/clear the table and by not being able to order anything they want …. Wow, reading what I just wrote makes me feel pretty crappy.
We blow way too much money eating out . It is just easy and quick. I don’t like to cook but the truth is it is too expensive and not even very healthy!
I’m just as guilty of this. Frankly, if I don’t keep the cupboards stocked and easy meals ready to prepare, chances are we will end up eating out or ordering takeout. We are super busy and sometimes it’s just so EASY.
I’m terrible about the planning thing. Way too when my husband asks “what’s for dinner tonight” when he comes home from work my answer is “uhh…dang it, I forgot to put chicken in the fridge to thaw. Umm…” and then he gets us something fast food too many of those times. I really need to get back on track with meal planning at least loosely!
that’d be way too *often* lol. Too early in the morning for me to type coherent sentences I guess!
I think the closest reason I could relate is number 2—lack of planning. I’m actually pretty good about meal planning (I pick 5 recipes a week) but once in a while something happens: either the food isn’t enough for all 7 days, or one of the meals turns out terrible.
I could also add convenience to your list. Sometimes even though we have food at home, it’s easier to pop in a restaurant especially if we’ve had a long outing or if we’re not looking forward to cooking or heating up food at home.
This is my problem with cutting back in our budget. We already rarely eat out, so it’s not something I can cut! And many of the other often-recommended items aren’t in our habits, either, like gyms, hair salons, movies out, or cable TV.
Some of the things we do when I haven’t planned ahead well are Breakfast-for-dinner (waffles are a favorite here) or “Sandwich Night.” Quickly defrosted and browned ground meat (or even opening a can of kidney beans) with some lettuce and cheese makes it easy to throw together nachos, tacos, or taco salad, depending on what other parts and pieces we have around…Sometimes there is a choice, since they mostly use the same ingredients.
#2 & #3.
#3 Solution – Google Calendar my meal plan (think repeat calendar entries with links to recipes in the invitation. I have come up with about 20 meal we all like and I rotate them every month. Once we got starting with 10 great recipes or theme nights, I added more and more healthy easy meals (repeating with recipe right there.) So when grocery shopping I just make a list at work or click through the recipes from by iPhone. It’s awesome.
#2 I’m still working on that one.
We honestly never eat out unless its planned for a treat (once or twice a month). I work from home and live a half mile away from a grocery store so there’s really no excuse! Plus, I am lucky enough to have a husband who cooks every other night. I can’t say I meal plan too tightly, I have a general idea of the 3-4 things I might make in a week and can always dash out for an ingredient or two if I change my mind. I think being vegetarian helps, no “thawing” necessary!
Budgeting was what fixed the problem for us. We set a monthly eating out budget and try very hard to stick to it. Other things that help are to keep a well stocked pantry and having a handful of ideas of emergency quick-fix meals.
And I’ve got another suggestion for #3: Feed the kids an early dinner of their favorite kid-friendly food, then after bedtime, have a grown-up meal by candlelight!