I’m excited to share this post as part of a new partnership with Disney Baby, where I’m going to have a chance to write a lot more posts geared toward expectant and new mothers. Check out the end of the post for more details!
Of all the parenting misinformation out there, the idea that babies regularly “sleep through the night” at a very young age – if you’re doing your job right, of course – is perhaps the cruelest. As if it wasn’t hard enough to make sure you’re getting enough sleep yourself, now you’re supposed to stress out over your baby’s sleep habits?
Here’s the truth: newborns are biologically programmed to have irregular sleep patterns. And “sleeping through the night”, according to medical experts, simply refers to a 6-hour period of uninterrupted sleep (some say 5 hours; I’ve been unable to find a consensus). That means if you put your baby down at 8 PM and he sleeps until 2 AM, guess what? He “slept through the night!” (Didn’t feel like it, though, hmm?)
Parents like – and need – to sleep, so by all means, read up on different methods and techniques for helping your baby sleep longer if you like, and use the ones that feel right for you. Just don’t freak out about it, or get down on yourself if your baby doesn’t seem to fit the sleep-training mold. As any mom with more than one kid can tell you? There is no mold! (And it’s totally OK not to follow any sleep program in particular, too. Lots of babies never get “trained” and still end up sleeping just fine when they get older.)
Losing the baby weight:
By now I’m sure you’ve heard the tired old advice: “It took you 9 months to gain the weight; it should take 9 months to take it off.”
Well, maybe, maybe not. Some women seem to shed their pregnancy weight within a matter of weeks. For some, it likes to hang around a bit longer – or a lot longer.
I always found that the increase in breastfeeding around the time my babies started crawling led to a sudden and rapid loss of those last stubborn pounds. Other women find that their bodies like to hang on to a little extra cushion while they’re nursing. A lot of how your body responds will depend on your genetics, activity level and hormones.
But no matter where you fall on the spectrum, you definitely do not need to be freaking out about losing weight when you have a new baby!
Eat sensibly, incorporate some movement into your life…and then try to relax, be patient, and make room for more exercise or fitness efforts as the time and energy becomes available.
There’s no rush: you have the rest of your life to try to fit back into your old jeans!
Enrichment Activities:
Yes, there are a lot of classes, workshops and activities out there that promise to help socialize, enrich and teach your baby. But a newborn gets all the socializing and learning she needs just by watching and interacting with Mom and Dad.
“Mommy and Me” type classes can be fun for you and offer a good way to get out of the house and meet other parents in the same boat, but trust me: you don’t need to sign up for outside activities to have a smart, happy, social baby. And if you don’t have the budget or the desire to sign up? It’s definitely not freak-out-worthy.
Note: “don’t freak out” doesn’t mean I think you shouldn’t consider any of these issues. I know that would be impossible! But don’t let yourself get too anxious or stressed over any one thing. Your baby will continue to change over the coming months and years, and you’ll start to develop a rhythm and understand how to make all the parts of your life fit together again.
In the meanwhile, stop, take a deep breath, consult a mom friend you trust…and don’t. freak. out.
This post was sponsored by Disney Baby. I’ll be joining the Disney Baby blogging team next month, and look forward to sharing more stories to help women make the journey to motherhood a happy one! Stay tuned for more details!
Thanks for sharing this wonderful information..I was really worried about these things, but your words have really calmed down my inner storm. Now, I feel much relaxed for myself and my baby.
Thanks for the post Meagan, and I’m glad you spoke a little about having a support system behind you. My husband is getting a job transfer/promotion to the Denver area next month (we live in NYC now) and even though I’m over the moon with excitement, I’m worried about not having friends/family around when we [hopefully] have our 2nd child sometime next year. I’m going from working full time now to staying at home with my 2 year old son (finally!). Any tips on making new friends in a new area?
Kate–you can go to your local park. You will surely find either other moms, dads or at least the nannies and ask them for even more places to go to with your kids. 🙂
A week after Baguette was born, I realized that my jeans (the maternity ones) were really loose. I got on the scale and found that I was already below my pre-pregnancy weight.
This sounds like bragging, but here’s the thing: I didn’t LOOK like I was below my pre-pregnancy weight. I didn’t look pregnant any more, but my shape was completely alien to me for quite a while. So no matter what the scale said, I was not back where I started. I’m still not, and I’m okay with that.
And the reason wasn’t anything I can patent, and to a great extent nothing I’d recommend. It was simply breastfeeding, exhaustion, and malnourishment. Breastfeeding was so hard, and so time-consuming, that some days I barely ate. Not good, no matter what the scale says.
Be healthy. The rest is only surface. And your baby will love you exactly as you are.
Yes! To all of these!
I remember feeling horribly guilty about the lack of tummy time for my first born. He still walked/crawled on time. I didn’t even both with ANY tummy time for my 2nd born, knowing that she would be okay . 🙂
So true! Every baby and mommy is different – sums it up pretty well?
With my first the weight dropped off (and then some) immediately with breast feeding. I’ve always been naturally underweight and my kids sure had metabolism! I am sure I Was pigging out like crazy just to keep up with the breastfeeding. With my second I gained weight horribly while breastfeeding (hormones). I believe that was after the weight dropped off in a few days like the first time. THe only time in my life I have ever had to be so vigilant with what I ate, and still gained like crazy. Boy, the body can behave different pregnancy to pregancy…
I think after the second time I cringed every time someone would say “just breastfeed to lose weight.” If I just heard that in general said about anyone. Ugh!! I had to stop breastfeeding to get my hormone levels to a liveable level, personally (many other issues besides weight). My hormones just never got so whacked out the first time.
I agree with all these. Other than eating my normally healthy diet, the weight came off on its own in due time. I still have an extra 5-8 pounds compared to pre-pregnancy, but I’m at least down to my regular size.
I also don’t care much for enrichment classes at such a young age. As a baby, all they need is your face and they’re entertained for hours on end!
Meagan–you hit the nail on the head on all three points in this post! In fact, I remember many other details I worried about with my firstborn. I certainly wish your Happiest Mom book was out in time for my firstborn. Anyway, congratulations as well on joining the Disney Baby team! Best wishes with all your endeavors!