What’s your usual Father’s Day routine? Do you go out for a special breakfast or brunch? Present Dad with a homemade card from the kids and maybe a new power tool from yourself?
I admit that in our house we don’t stress out much about the so-called “Hallmark Holidays.” We usually try to do a little something special for one another on Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, but don’t worry too much if we don’t get a gift or end up separated from the kids on that particular day (this year we were in Florida with two of the five kids on Mother’s Day, and this weekend, those same two boys will be at my sister’s house on Father’s Day!)
What I like about this kind of holiday isn’t the gifts and material recognition, but that it gives us the opportunity to consider the person’s role in our lives, how important he or she is to us, and how we can show our appreciation – in big ways and small.
This year I’m feeling especially appreciative of my husband Jon. Since my surgery I’ve barely had to lift a finger, as he’s mobilized the family workforce to take care of all of my needs and the household chores. And while I probably won’t be able to make a shopping trip to pick him up a new tie this year, there are some easy ways I can help him feel appreciated this Father’s Day.
Or, you know…every day.
- Give him a long, lingering kiss. (Without thinking about a) the dishes in the sink b) the kid calling from the other room c) the email I need to answer.)
- Tell him how much I appreciate him. Even better: tell him specifically the things that I appreciate, i.e., how good he is at picking out the exact sorts of gifts and treats I like, or how able and willing he is to take all the kids out of the house so I can get some rest!)
- Get off his back. Yes, in our household I have definitely taken on the taskmaster role (I prefer to think of myself as a female version of Carson from Downton Abbey – hey, it’s an important job!) but after a while, all my “reminding” does start to sound a little like, well…nagging. For one day, would it be possible not make a single request, suggestion, or reminder? I think so.
- Two words: sexy time. (Okay, that’s something I actually can’t do this year due to post-surgery restrictions, but I’m shelving it for a more appropriate moment!)
- Talk about him (in front of him.) It’s easy to fall into good-natured teasing and sometimes, even not-very-well-disguised griping in front of other people – including the kids. But whenever I use the opportunity of talking to or about my husband as a way to brag about him, it’s totally worth it. It just feels better to build him up than bring him down, and I know it makes him feel good, too.